parfait

you know what it takes to garnish a parfait? brass balls

I would strangle a puma with its own face then jump over a dead hooker just to eat a parfait. They're as much a delight to eat as they are to look at. Also, elephant in the room, you might want to whip out some dead hooker-away or whatever and spray that shit on the dead hooker. I'm not going down for this, understand? And you saw what I did to that puma...

This is a good, easy, not too fancy parfait (in case you're not man enough to eat a parfait with your head held high) & and I always pour a little out for my fallen puma adversaries. Actually no I don't. I'm not wasting perfectly good parfait on a puma that can't even maul me. That's ridiculous. Although it may explain the group of bloodthirsty puma ghosts who haunt my apartment.

note: you can use home made granola for this, but I used a cereal I got from the store. It's ideal for this. I actually like it better for parfait than my granola, no offense inner self. It's flakes help keep a nice barrier between the layers. And they're super processed, so they hold up. You can actually make it right before bed and keep it in the fridge. Not pretty, but still amazing.

yes this image is filler. yes i'm ok with that.

parfait
(makes a parfait)

greek yogurt
cereal or granola
frozen berry medley (or fresh if they're in season, bossy)

get yourself a glass

it doesn't really matter how you stack this, just start with yogurt on the bottom, then cereal, then berries (or vice versa) repeat twice. make the top fancy if you like it fancy on the top. no one's stopping you.

If using frozen berries, they need to thaw a bit before consumption. The drive to work does it for me.

For a zany spin on this, you can try parfait served with 2-8 strips of bacon. Who would've thought?